Birthday Burn - Appendix

Thursday, May 18th

Mike and Amy are at it again! They've teamed up with Mark to prank his wife Barbara for her birthday. Mark just got his appendix removed but "Dr." Mike wants to put it back. How would you react if you got this phone call?

Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

Mike: Good morning Mark how are you? Mark: Hey guys, how are you doing Mike and Amy? Mike: So mark wants to prank his lovely wife Barbara. Mark: Yeah Mike: And do you guys have a good pranking tradition with each other? Do you give each other a hard time? Mark: Yeah, yeah we kind of get each other here and there you know April fools week we got each other pretty good. And just little stuff here in the air but I wanna get her a really good this. Mike: Okay well it's her birthday so yeah. Now Amy tells me that you just had - what do they do? Amy: He had his appendix out right? Mike: Yeah and how you feeling, you alright? Mark: Yeah, yeah I'm recuperating. You know, it wasn't like I didn't have some problems and it wasn't like an emergency or anything like that, but the doctors just thought it would be best to you know, prevent something before it got to be like an emergency. You know, just a better to be on the safe side. Mike: You're feeling better and you're in everything's going well? Mark: Yeah, yeah everything's gone pretty good. But yeah, if you guys could do a birthday burn on her, like I don't know, pretend like you're calling from the hospital and I don't know may be like I don't know what you guys think it's something like if I was the wrong patient Mike: Yeah how about we have to put the appendix back in? Like we took it out of the wrong guy? Mark: Oh my God, yeah that would be great! Mike: Maybe, we don't know how do we? Let's see what happens. Let me give Barbara call here and I have something in mind here, give me a second. Hello, is this Barbara. Barbara: Hello, yes Mike: Is this Barbara Connors. Barbara: Yes, who is this? Mike: My name is LaMont Tarlon and I'm calling... *giggles* Tarlon what the hell is that? Amy: It's like a palindrome. Barbara: I'm sorry, who? Mike: My name is LaMont Tarlon and I'm calling from Meridian Park Hospital. Barbara: Oh, okay. Hello. Mike: Your husband I understand your husband just had a recent procedure, an appendectomy. Barbara: Yes he did okay. And a follow up call and while I was in the followup call and while I was doing the follow-up call, I really don't know how to tell you this Barbara. It turns out that the procedure that you're has been Mark had the appendectomy was as it turns out completely, and utterly unnecessary. I've only now realized that his appendix were completely fine and there was actually no issue we and actually confused Mark with another one of our patients who did, in fact, have a problem with the appendix. This is a very awkward situation it does happen from time to time due to clerical errors and such. Barbara: Um, I'm sorry I don't know that I'm understanding you correctly. He - the doctors said he had to have his appendix out Mike: It actually did, his appendix was pink and perfect his appendix repeat imperfect as it turns out and there was no reason for the procedure whatsoever. Now, that's the bad news. Barbara: Wait, I'm just, I'm wondering why didn't anyone say anything to us? Mike: We're saying, we're we're saying it now that we didn't realize until just now. Well that's the problem don't realize that we didn't realize until just now so we're just letting you know. Barbara: So there's nothing you could do? Mike: Well no, that's the good news this is what's great - at our hospital and, by the way not every hospital does this, so keep this in mind for all your future procedures because what we do is we hang on to the harvested organs. His appendix, we actually have it on ice and the best part is that if he can come back and and we're, I'm calling to make an appointment, maybe next week we can put them right back in, put them right back it's like it never happened. Barbara: WHAT?! Mike: We would like to schedule a re insertion of the mistakenly removed appendix. And and we're gonna waive it away any and all intake fees. You just pay for the procedure and that is it. We're not gonna nickel and dime on this one because it was our error and we, we really apologize. Barbara: Wait a minute, I mean look, this doesn't make any sense. You don't put - I mean this was weeks ago! You don't put it back in there! I, I... What's your name? Mike: We've got it sitting right - LaMont Tarlon. I've actually got the appendix sitting right here in a zip lock bag full ice. I mean it looks really good to me, we can put it right back in and it will be like it never happened. We feel it's more important to have a heathy appendix than to not. Barbara: He had to have that taken out. I don't understand. The doctor said - Mike: What happened was, there was a guy any Marc on the same docket and he spelled his name M-A-R-C and your husband spells his name M-A-R-K and that's what we got mixed up because somebody had written it down wrong with a Sharpie. Barbara: *Sigh* Oh... okay. The doctor said that he had to have it taken out, he had to have it taken out. Well why wouldn't you say anything - Mike: Well, technically.. Barbara: How - Aren't you supposed to double check the knee? Mike:Technically he wasn't a doctor per se... Barbara: WHAT?! Mike: I mean he was doctor ish, doctor like he had some medical training I think in the army. Barbara: The person who took my husband's appendix out wasn't a doctor?! Mike: I mean not in the strictest sense of the or were they may be. Maybe in the Philippines or something but not I don't think he was here in the United States you know technically a doctor but. Barbara: But I met him - he introduced himself as a doctor! Mike: His first his first name actually is Doctor, that's what his mom and dad named him - Doctor. Barbara: WHO IS THIS?! Mike: At least technically he was a doctor.. Barbara: Wait a second, no, no, no, no, no. What is your name? How are you affiliated with the hospital? Mike: One of the attendings, he just came in and got the zip lock bag and he's ready to go as soon as we get Marc back in. Barbara: No... I need to know your name and how you're affiliated with the hospital and I think maybe I need to speak to your supervisor. Mike: Alright, alright, yes. Now my name is Mike Chase and I work at Mike and Amy in the Morning on 99.5 The Wolf. Amy: Assisting in the procedure is Amy Foust Mike: That's right and this is a birthday burn for you on the radio you! Amy: Mark with a K are you there? Barbara: Oh my God... Mark: Happy birthday baby! Barbara: Are you kidding me right now? I'm pacing right now. Mark: I can't believe you bought into that! Amy: But she was sticking up for you! Barbara: That's not funny! Mike: You say that now... Mark: But she's laughing! Mike: Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry about that - sorry not sorry for that okay? But I hope I hope you have a happy birthday. Amy: It's uphill from here! Mike: Yes I can be any worse than this right? I'm not going to tell you what the present is but I can tell you it comes in a ziploc bag with ice in it. Anyway, thanks you guys - happy birthday mark or have a birthday Barbara! Barbara: Thank you guys.